Mx. Luna Corbden 🪿🐸

@ErickaSimone THE THING I WAS REACTING TO IS A TRANS WOMAN WHO DIED IN MEDICAL CARE BECAUSE THEY DIDN'T THINK SHE WAS A AS WOMAN. THAT'S THE CENTER OF THIS CONVO. THAT'S WHAT I WAS TALKING ABOUT FROM THE START.

@ErickaSimone I mean, I didn't. I was and still an genuinely mad about the news story. Which is why I was reactive and didn't properly build up to the point so it made sense and instead started in the middle where it landed really badly.

I'm conflict avoidant and don't post politically much anymore to avoid conflict and avoid hurting anyone. I am really sorry I didn't think it through.

@ErickaSimone @mhoye Me too! I'm disgusted to! Of course we need separate spaces *now*. I fully agree.

I'm calling for men to stop being rapey and to stop each other from it so that generations from now none of this will matter.

And trans women ARE women and deserve cancer care regardless.

@mhoye @ErickaSimone This. This is what I was trying to say. That the way things are can change. And that men have to change it. And that it is in the best interests of (nonrapey) men to change it. I started in a weird spot in that conversation because I was emotional that they let a trans woman die and that none of this could have prevented any of MY rapes.

@noodlemaz Yeah, I was upset and failed to properly set up the thread. MRAs are misogynists. I was trying to show a not toxic way for men to make their and everyone else's lives better.

@ErickaSimone I'm AFAB genderfluid and lived most of my life as a woman until recently. That's where I'm coming from, that men need to be different. That Ken need to fight their stereotypes by being better people.

This is a nota conversation about poor men being picked in by feminists. This is a feminist conversation about punching holes through the assumptions we all hold that keep things the way they are. I feel I have a right to hold it as a DV survivor and multiple-rape survivor while living as a woman. I kind of went off in this rant unplanned while deep in thought about a trans woman who died because they wouldn't put her in the women's OR men's ward.

But maybe I could preface it better. The context of my past gender experiences does matter and not everyone gets that from my profile. (The woes of being nonbinary.)

Because, having lived life as a woman, I can tell you how much energy I put into avoiding being perceived with negative woman stereotypes.

Does he think I'm stupid? Does that small mistakes make me look like a bad driver? If I don't phrase this just right, will he think I don't know what I'm talking about? Don't ever change your mind, that's a thing stereotypical women do. Am I using this tool incorrectly and will someone mock me if they notice? I will lift that heavy thing no matter what so they know I'm just as strong. I will endure this pain without complaint so they know I can take it. I will keep my emotions calm and measured so they don't think I'm just a hysterical woman.

I AVOID these stereotypes. I feel it incumbent upon me as a woman to disprove these stereotypes! We all do. Feminists do. To the point of being unhealthy. In fact, I'm remembering a blog post I wrote (I may link it later) during one of the Twitter dramas way back, over whether it was ok for a female gamer to openly enjoy picking the healer role ona raid because that reinforces the stereotype.

Men's rights activists, where the hell are you on this? It seems as if you LIKE having the stereotype of being rapey. What is this???

Cis men, do you LIKE the stereotype that you're rapey????????

It's absolutely bonkers! Underlying all this trans panic is the assumption that any random group of men will get rapey. That we've got to keep all men away from women or women are going to get hurt. Where is the manosphere on that?? You're outraged over "she would pick the bear" yet are ok that she doesn't feel safe with you in a public bathroom. Where is your outrage over men who make men look bad?? Is that why you fear trans women? Because the discussion reveals the true issues about women's safety??? Because it points the arrow at who is allowing what and how ridiculous that is?? Cis men, do you LIKE the stereotype that you're rapey????????

?????????????????!?????????????????

Like, I have only recently and partially joined the ranks of manhood, and I gotta say guys, this is some sorry state you've left this place in. Clean up! The women think we're monsters!!

Like, it occurs to me that the assumption that men will get rapey is deeply misandrist. "Well if you let men into women's locker rooms they'll get handsy!" wtf is that horrible stereotype all about?? Men are letting some smaller percentage define this terrible traits against the whole gender! Such that women are afraid to sleep in the same hospital ward? How is that ok?? Maybe it's rapey people we should be segregating off!

And people are like "well if men and women are sleeping on the same floor, the men might get rapey!" Well about that, why do we let men get rapey?? We don't have guards standing over people's jello in the hospital to make sure no one steals it. Why not? Because if someone screams "he took my jello!" someone would try to stop that. He'd be punished and everyone would be mad at him. Why not have a "rapey ward" where we put all the people known to be rapey? And let all the people who know how to not rape share a ward regardless of gender?

But why the hell does the NHS have separate cancer wards for men and women in the first place?? Do we have that here in the US? I'm pretty sure our hospitals are coed? It would make sense to segregate multi-person rooms, since you're walking to the bathroom with your but hanging out. Speaking of, why do we have gowns that are open in the back? I get why they need to open quickly for medical emergencies, but surely a gown can be designed so it opens fast but doesn't flap around. Hasn't anyone heard of snaps in the front? Why is any of this like this in the first place??